Once again, I forgot about my little corner of the cyberworld that my one reader reads. It would take too long to catch it up on all that transpired since the last post but I will say this, Kris and my duet was a hit! Kris did really well and no one could hear me anyway YAY! I have been given the new piece for IHSA and my piano teacher and I will work on it once the new year starts and I am back at lessons.
I've always purposefully kept the cancer part of my life out of my blog because I wanted my corner to be unfettered with the worries that come from being a cancer patient. Things were going well and I wanted one part of my life untouched by it but that is no longer possible. January 7 we will start the "battle of lung mets." In November, I opted for a lung biopsy because some nodules we were watching grew a little bit. One grew about 3mm, one grew 1mm and one is still stable. Unfortunately, the Radiologist noted that several barely detectable nodules are beginning to form. At this time, they aren't even 1mm. Worst fears confirmed, the sarcoma has been in my lung since shortly after surgery. Bummer! The good news is, it's a relatively slow growing sarcoma, a Malignant Peripheral Nerve Sheath tumor, stubborn, chemo insensitive, very rare. So, here is what is in my cancer kicking toolbox
1- Budwig nutritional protocol. I make sure my Omega 3 to Omega 6 ratio is what it is supposed to be.
I eat very very little meat. I'll admit there are days I would like nothing more than a HUGE cheeseburger!
I don't eat sugar (sucks royally! For some, a life without chocolate is not a life worth living. I have found a few substitutions but...it's just not the same.)
I don't eat refined sugar or flour.
I don't eat processed foods
1- daily dose of green juice that tastes absolutely terrible but I call it a cup of health and envision all the nutrients in that pressed, kale, turnip, collard and mustard greens, celery, cucumber and wheat grass powder, surrounding the cancer cells like the calvary and shooting it down.
1- really huge plate of raw salad, loaded with veggies, dressed with Braggs raw cider vinegar, sometimes topped with Nutritional yeast.
1- serving of fresh fruit. I'm starting to really appreciate grapes and mango. YUM.
1- healthy attitude. There's a part of me that is in denial but I call it a healthy denial. I don't stop my life, don't use my condition as an excuse to stop living and get away with locking myself in a room feeling sorry for myself. Understandably life is a terminal condition and eventually we will all leave this Earth but I'm denying that it is going to happen soon and on terms other than mine.
I REFUSE to give up my daily cup of coffee. I've been told tea is better for me. Maybe, maybe not. I never cared for tea. Drinking it causes me stress. Stress causes health issues. NO TEA FOR ME!
On Jan 7th, I opted to take part in a clinical trial for a new drug called Brivanib. I decided to live the holidays in my healthy denial and ease gently into reality with a nice drink of contrast dye and a pass through the medical donut hole into the medical netherworld that is far from the normal life that I had prior to diagnosis. I feel like Neo when he ventures out of the matrix. Cancer is my Morpheus. Denial can be so wonderful! In my denial world, Cancer can be washed away with a plate of veggies and a glass of kelly green juice that tastes like well...grass. Life goes on as before and I am immortal. My mind can make it go away simply by wishing it. The movie and book "The Secret" touch upon this concept, that I can put my order in to the universe that overdosing on nutrition can wash the cancer away and my healthy denial can become a healthy reality.
Never tell me the odds! a creedo stated by the wise and wonderful Han Solo :)
That's all for now. I'm going to ease silently back into the Matrix and enjoy my Christmas, the lights, the tree, the gifts, the food, the hangover...all of it. May your Christmas be fulfilling.