AHHH Motherhood!

I received this little gem in my inbox the other day.
25 REASONS I'VE LEARNED TO APPRECIATE MY MOTHER:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning.'

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .
'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!'

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
' Because I said so, that's why .'

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to
the store with me.'

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.'

7. My mother taught me IRONY
'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.'

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM .
'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
'If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!'

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE .
'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
'Stop acting like your father!'

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do.'

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
'Just wait until we get home.'

17.. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
'You are going to get it when you get home!'

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way.'

19. My mother taught me ESP..
'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
'When that lawn mower cuts off your foot, don't come running to me.'

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
'You're just like your father.'

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
'Shut that door behind you... Do you think you were born in a barn?'

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.'

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.'

If I thought cancer was tough, try teenagers. Now, I know I am dealing with the usual teen angst but it doesn't make it any easier. My 16 year old son suffers from an intolerable lack of motivation and a sense of self entitlement that is just mind boggling. The child knows the rules. As I've been dealing with a swarm of fruit flies, I have been trying and failing to find the source. The other day, I went into my son's room downstairs in the basement, a room he fondly calls "The Man Cave!" and opened his closet. Inside was an empty cereal box and a few juice box wrappers. As the rule is NO EATING DOWNSTAIRS and he knows this, I excavated the rest of his room and found under his bed, empty DelMOnte fruit cups, empty boxes of fruit roll ups, spoons, forks, a couple empty cereal bowls with spoons stuck to them, dirty socks, candy wrappers, clothes that have been missing for months and an empty shoe box. I moved the bed out of the way and swept everything to the center of Kris's room. I then proceeded to excavate drawers and the area behind his dresser and to my dismay found more of the same. Perhaps the fruit flies came from the apple core that was petrified behind the night table or the dried cat yak or the spilled coca cola that oozed into a sticky mess on the floor and had a sock stuck to it. IT's a mystery. I left it for him to clean when he returned home. After checking his grades online, I tried to have a meaningful conversation with my son and was met with snide remarks, sarcasm, no sense of remorse, no responsibility and a flip comment that I should just be happy that all he did was eat too much. Feeling that I was losing my cool, I exited stage left after resorting to one of the above list of cliches. My son is bright and he can be doing so much more but he's lazy and he's careless and right now, I am resigned to the fact that I will watch this child fall on his butt many times in life and will hope that he learns from it and will pray that I can handle watching this child fall. My son will say I have little faith in him. I am not 100% sure that that is the case. I have given my son ample opportunities to prove that he is trustworthy, a discussion he and I have had 100 times and falls on deaf ears. He just simply has not risen to the occasion to prove himself and it seems that nothing that I do helps. I'm frustrated. Very frustrated. After watching me work two, three jobs, agonize over bills, go through cancer, move mountains to give them good Christmases, he has totally gleaned the wrong message from all my hard work. The message he has gotten is that I will do it. He is not responsible for anything that he does. He does not deserve any consequences he gets. College is a right, not a privilege. Subpar work should result in accolades. UGH! My boy has a bit of his father in him. My ex is living at home at the age of 47, walked away from his kids 5 years ago, has never paid child support, shown the kids any consistency with visitation, wound up in jail for drug dealing, is an alcoholic and blames ME for his lousy life. Funny how he heard his father's message loud and clear but not mine.
TOugh Love!
Last year, my son racked up a 200 dollar cell phone bill texting and downloading. I took away his phone for a month with a stern warning that one more time would result in me turning it off. Sure enough, within one month he racked up a 400 dollar bill doing the same. His cell phone was turned off. Who cares? He said. I'll get a job and get my own phone. Suit yourself! He still has no job and still has no phone.
Last year, my son after destroying his bike, used my daughters, left it in the backyard of a friends house and it was stolen. He still does not understand why I'm angry. He will buy her a new bike when he gets a job (ahh the job. the job he hasn't applied for yet!). I grounded him from playing in the baseball tournament. Did that help? OF COURSE NOT! His paternal grandfather was so upset with ME for grounding my son, he took a poll, yes a POLL of his friends and family to determine if I was unfair. Guess who came up with the short straw. Not the irresponsible teenager, ME. TO this day, my son only heard that I was unfair and he didn't deserve the punishment and who steals a bike from the back of the house anyway?! To really add insult to injury, he snuck out of the house and played a tournament game anyway while I was at work. I grounded him from drivers ed. That actually went somewhere. I told him that if he doesn't follow the rules, there won't be a signature for the drivers license test. Who cares? He said...He'll be 18 in a year and won't need a signature and when he gets that job he can afford his own car and insurance. I can only laugh to keep from crying.

PPS: I have two prayer requests. Two children, Sammie H and Jessica E are nearing the end of their Earthly life. Sammie, 12, has Osteosarcoma. Jessica is 7 days shy of her 11th birthday and so wants to spend it here on Earth. She has Rhabomyosarcoma. Please pray for these two children and their families. Pray Jessica can celebrate her 11th birthday with her family and for strength for the days ahead for those left behind.